Samm Has Already Planned her Funeral
I haven't even hit 30 yet, but you never know how much longer you have. This isn't a morbid blog - it's lighthearted and fun.
Why you ask? Singer Sam Smith was recently on a talk show. They joked and said his songs are so sad, that they would be too sad to play at his funeral. Sam's response was priceless. He said there will be disco music and drag queens! So that got me to thinking. What would I want? Here it is:
First of all, funerals are brutal. You are all crammed like sardines in a small church listening to this stiff dedication to a person. It's not the funeral directors fault. They don't know you like other people know you. That's why my funeral will be a celebration of life, not your standard burial.
I will be cremated. My family can put my ashes in a coffee can until they find the perfect place for me - I LOVE coffee. I want to live eternally on a beach, so they can spread my ashes by the Atlantic ocean in Tybee Island, Georgia - where I got married.
I work in radio and I'm very musical, so it's a given that when people hear certain songs, they'll think of me! I don't need to add misery to an already sad event. I want HAPPY music played. If Spice Girls are not playing as you say farewell to me, I will come back and haunt you. ;)
Plus, I will have an open bar and a hot dog cart! Why not?