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My first Covid-19 test is done and out of the way and I have to say...the women were right (again) about what it was like. IF you haven't had one yet, here's how it goes at Mayo  Clinic (Charlton lab).

You go into the lab...


Make sure it's the correct lab and not the one for proctology testing.


Yep, I'm in the right place.

The next bits are like most Mayo lab appointments. You check in, make a joke they've heard a million times, they chuckle politely, and then you take a seat, they'll call you. They called me and, just like every other visit, I went back, made some more jokes they were polite enough to laugh at, and was shown into the little room. There's paper on the glass part of the door, so no one's looking in to see what's going on in this here little room.

Nothing fancy about the room...the nurse is there, polite about your jokes as you to sit and you lower your mask below your nose. They tell you they're going to shove a swab up your nose (not their words...their words were nice and calming), spin it around like an ice auger (again, not their words), then yank it out and yell BINGO (as you may have guessed by now, that is NOT how they said it).

Then they do it. And it takes 10 seconds...they count it down and swivel around, rev the auger a bit, and then you're out.


Then you're out (grab a tissue, you're eyes will water). 

I think that's the fastest test I've ever had. Not the least invasive, and not the most comfortable (tho saying it is uncomfortable would be going too far...it's a few seconds of, "huh...I have a snot ball up there"). Here's how I looked after (and yes, there WAS a kissing octopus on my forehead and not at all to cover my zit!).

Rabe and the Smooching Octopus and absolutely no zit. (James Rabe)

They say the results'll come back in 24 hours, but I got the notice at 5:48 PM. My test was at 10:20 (pretty much on the dot!), so way less than 24 hours.

Negative is good.

ps - I didn't have the test done because I was worried I had the Rona. I'm having my left eye's lens replaced on Friday. That's not how they say it of course...😉

As always, Mayo...professional, friendly, and I felt safe the entire time.

TEST REVIEWS REVIEW: Men mostly told me it was going to be hell (barbed wire on a stick with a cotton ball on the end). Women mostly told me it was, "meh...I've had worse." Once again, the women were accurate for me.

Listen to James Rabe and Jessica Williams 6a to 10a on Y-105 FM's Early Morning Show.

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